Dear Rookies, It Gets Better

[twitter]It gets better. It really does. I know from experience.

I couldn’t take it. The screaming. The crying. The screaming. No matter how I held my son, how I whispered, how I changed his diaper, how I fed him – no matter what I did it didn’t matter. He screamed. He cried. He screamed.

To make matters worse, I was home alone. A new father, who “knew what to do” but at the same time was desperately looking for someone to take over. My wife was having a much deserved time out with her friends, one of her first times being away from our new son, but I needed her. Badly.

I called her cell and didn’t say anything, I just put the receiver to my son’s scream and let him do the talking. I knew that sound would be too much for her, and she would come and rescue me.

It was a dirty trick, but it worked. She came home early. It soured our relationship for a short period of time, I couldn’t handle the heat and she resented me for it. These were the kinds of things she was dealing with when I was out to work, and if she could do it, why couldn’t I – that kind of stuff.

But I couldn’t hack it. I needed a lifeline, and got one. Desperate times. Desperate measures.

So I fully understand how Jay Cutler got overwhelmed being alone with his kids and reached out to his wife for rescue.

He was sure to pay for it on the home front after taking a knee like that, just as I did. I guess he wasn’t expecting his wife to throw him under every social media bus and mommy blog by sharing his private text for help with the world.

Cavallari is trying to break down the assumptions of her status. Her husband may have a 7yr $126.7M contract to play for the Chicago Bears, but she wants everyone to know they keep it real. Which is good. Because, just like football, parenting is a team sport.

The story went viral and while some sympathized with Cutler’s parental quandry, Good Morning America chose to tow the “doofus dad” script and even dropped the words that must never be spoken.. “Mr Mom.”

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No, Jay Cutler wasn’t “playing mom” he was being a dad. He was being an involved parent. He was looking after his kids and, just like happens to him on Sundays with the Bears, he got sacked. The kids put up a swarming defence and he was looking to the sidelines for a break.

Dads can crack. Moms can crack. This isn’t a time for pointing fingers and wanting “your man to appreciate u?” Because if your man is worth anything he already appreciates what you do because he’s in the trenches doing it too.

Rookie parents, you need to know that it gets better. Laughter will soon follow the screams, pride will replace the stress, and you’ll never imagine how you lived life without your kids in it.

Parenting isn’t a mom thing that dads need to “deal with,” it’s a journey filled with ups and downs and failures.

Just ask Jay Cutler. He knows all about it.

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